So close…

So close is a good way to describe this end of the year.
It is funny how transitions sneak up on me, even though they are so blatantly obvious. Apparently I am stressed about the change of jobs and did not even noticed it. It is possible that I have lived in a constant state of anxiety over the past years, that I don’t even notice it when the level gets bumped up, until, it affects my body somehow. For one, my hormones are wacked. I had a bit of trouble sleeping. Overthinking things? Sure, but that is normal. Not normal is not being able to sleep. It happened only a few times, so I am not too worried.
Had to see my Dr. today because I had a reaction to immunotherapy a couple weeks back. I am talking about this so much, but after my Dr.’s visit, I think the whole episode made an impact on me. It was an anaphylactic attack. Yep, I could have died. That is not the part that bothers me, but yet, the fact that I was alone with the kids when it happened. It would have scared them so much…. The Dr. mentioned that the fact that I did not freaked out helped because although I could not breath through my nose, my throat did not close up. And, I guess, my blood pressure also did not fall to dangerous levels and I probably only lost a little bit of oxygen from my brain. Oh, the drama. I always wanted to see or know how one of those attacks were like, and now, I do. It seems strange but I am kind of proud of the whole episode. In a humbling way of course. I really had no clue I was having an attack. Somehow, by God’s  grace it did not occurred to me that I could be having a anaphylatic attack. God’s grace and lack of oxygen in my brain, perhaps. Anyways, driving with the kids to CVS was probably not the best choice, as I could have passed out driving, but again, the lack of oxygen…. The Dr. said: most people, when having an attack, drive to the ER instead of the pharmacy. My first thought was that there was something wrong with my blood pressure, so I needed to check it. The second thought was that if I did go down in public, it would save my children from the whole “having to call 911 because mom is unresponsive” experience. But all in all, I am so thankful I did not go into shock, and I did not have to go to the ER….. I am still paying the bill for Pumpkin’s last visit…. (note to self- describe lost tooth episode).
Fotos do Dia de Acao de Gracas!